Dane Owner's Checklist



You know you are a Great Dane owner when...

DANE OWNER'S CHECKLIST
©1998-2008 Ginnie Saunders.
All rights reserved.

  • My Great Dane has ARTHRITIS.
    Does yours?

    We tried various brands of "glucosamine with chondriotin" pills on our elderly Great Dane, Merlin, and he didn't get the relief we were looking for – until we switched to a special LIQUID formulation.

    I highly recommend a liquid glucosamine with chondroitin formula to anyone whose dog is suffering from arthritis or hip dysplasia. Liquid formulations offer a much faster and more efficient absorption rate compared to pills.

    Merlin, who recently celebrated his 10th birthday, is feeling much better now, and I'm completely sold on the product!
                          — Ginnie Saunders

    Click here to learn more
    the power company requires you to relocate the electric meter to outside the fence
  • 3-year-old twin girls come into your house and ask excitedly if your fawn, who just had his ears cropped and bandaged in orange tape, is a really a baby reindeer
  • your dog has broken your foot (at least once) when he stepped on it
  • the UPS man refuses to deliver packages
  • you are considering replacing a repeatedly broken window in your house with Great Dane Trailer Mud flaps so your exhuberant dog can stick his head ALL the way out the window without breaking the glass
  • your table tops are completly clear of knicknacks and debris
  • the Doberman actually walks under the seven-month-old puppy
  • the only "child" at the birthday party who can break open the pinata is your dog, who is excitedly whapping her tail, wondering why the little people are playing "tag" with small sticks
  • your dog goes from 12-pounds to just 102-pounds in 8 months
  • you no longer need to pre-rinse the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher
  • someone asks you what you feed a 150-pound dog and you answer without hesitation, "Anything he wants."
  • people actually ask before petting your dog
  • you wake up at night because your dog has started to run in his sleep and he's kicking you in the side
  • he wears your T-shirts
  • your dog often stands in front of the kitchen window -- looking in
  • in one play session, your 5-month-old dog gives you a punctured tongue, a punctured lip, a blood-shot eye, and an aching foot
  • you build your house with very wide hallways
  • you have a separate bedroom for the dog
  • you struggle to find a 32" tall baby gate and have at least 4 of them in the house
  • you have a 48" dog pen in your living room
  • you have a second 48" dog pen in your bedroom for when your bitch is in heat
  • storing a whelping box becomes a major challenge
  • when you get out of your car, there's a small crowd of people staring at it saying things like, "OhMyGod it's HUGE," and "That's the biggest dog I've ever seen," and "Son, don't you get too close to that thing!"
  • you keep an towel handy for when your dog shakes his head
  • your children no longer have to wash their faces
  • people drive vvvveeeerrrrryyyy slowly by your house, to catch a glimpse of those giant Dalmatians that crazy woman keeps
  • you buy a chest freezer just for the dog food
  • pouting, grumbling, talking back, and "copping an attitude" are normal when your dog doesn't get his way
  • walking the dog causes "little dog" owners to go pale and sweaty, clutch their dogs to their bosoms and run inside the nearest building
  • HE walks YOU
  • you jump 3 feet when he barks
  • you can discuss ears for hours
  • "crop failures" have no effect on the Commodity Market
  • you are at dinner and you turn your head for a second – next thing you know, dinner is gone
  • you have to buy an "indestructible" Kong toy every two months
  • your friends put things where "the dog won't get it" and the only one in the house that can reach it is the dog

 


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